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EARLY PRAISE "The Forgiveness Myth is a gem. In forty years of clinical practice, I have been searching for a book that explores the dilemmas of, and illuminates alternatives to, forgiveness. It is clear, well reasoned, respectful and inspiring, and full of excellent tools and strategies for hope and healing." Ruth Ackerman, Ph.D.,
"While my original intentions were to skim the book, the Preface hooked me. Each chapter resonated more with my spirit, and somewhere along the way, I began to be aware of the beginnings of a personal healing. For that I will be eternally grateful. If you pick up just one book to help you deal with past trauma, abuse or hurts in your life, let it be this one." KathyJo Dennison, Ph.D., R.N.,
"If you have ever been deeply hurt by someone and find yourself unwilling or unable to forgive, this book is for you. In a warm and engaging style, the authors challenge the notion that forgiveness is the only path to healing and wholeness, and chart what they find to be an equally fruitful approach to getting unstuck and on to a better life. Their ideas are encouraging, empowering, and practical; their book an invaluable resource for those who long to heal from life’s hurts." Thomas Hart, Ph.D., counselor and author of
"Based on the new and refreshing idea that there are many ways to heal when forgiving isn’t possible or desirable, readers will feel incredibly understood and supported as they discover their own path to peace and happiness. A great book that will be so helpful to so many! A huge contribution. Bravo!" Stephanie Brown, Ph.D., author of
"If forgiveness means acquiescing to evil or resigning yourself to being treated badly, then it is not just a myth – it is harmful. The Forgiveness Myth effectively explores alternative language and ideas for letting go, healing, and moving on, beyond the “F” word. I recommend it." Rabbi Debra Orenstein, coeditor of
"Employing insights from psychology, spirituality, and their own experience, Gary Egeberg and Wayne Raiter have crafted a courageous, ground-breaking book that challenges the assumption that forgiveness is the only way to move beyond the pain of interpersonal conflicts. By defining a path through the complexity of hurtful events and relationships, The Forgiveness Myth invites us to move beyond the conventional thinking about forgiveness that prevents us from being freely and fully alive. This book is a gentle and practical guide that will prove a valuable resource for dealing with one’s own resentments, or in assisting others to cope with theirs." Tom Stella, former Catholic priest, founder of Soul-Link,
"This sensitive, thoughtful and compassionate book brings a deeper understanding to the process of healing. It will help many who can’t or won’t forgive to move forward." Stephanie Covington, Ph.D., author of
"This book will be extraordinarily valuable and bring a sigh of relief to those whose emotional healing is stunted by the untruth that forgiveness is necessary to heal all wounds. I commend the authors for challenging the validity of a deeply ingrained concept. The Forgiveness Myth is full of rich examples and tools for recovery. It will appeal to clinicians of all levels and to those on their own personal healing journey. It is an enlightened, pragmatic, and empathetic guide." Heather Hayes, M.Ed., LPC,
"From a young age I have been a victim of sexual, physical, verbal, and emotional abuse. Being raised a strict Catholic, I believed I had to just forgive my abusers, but I couldn’t. They have not accepted any responsibility for their actions, nor have they admitted any wrongdoing. Yet, I believed that something must be wrong with me because I couldn’t forgive. The Forgiveness Myth has helped me to focus on what I need in order to begin to heal, rather than on what my abusers need. It has given me the freedom to accept my past in a new light. I am now on my journey towards healing and true happiness." Lynn
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